Dear Darestars Diva,

My girlfriend got me a cock ring for my birthday. She says it would be fun for us to play with. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do with it, but I’m too embarassed to admit that to her so I just thanked her and hid it in the bottom of the sock drawer. What is a cock ring for, and what do I do with it?

Sincerely,
Ring Around the ‘Rousal

Dear Ring Around,

One ring to rule them all and in the darkness bind them… or do the two of you like to have sex with the lights on? A cock ring is a device used to restrict the blood flow out of the penis. It can, among other things, allow a man to retain his erection for a longer period of time or delay orgasm. Which is not to say that your girlfriend is trying to tell you something. A lot of men really enjoy cock rings as a part of sexual play. An ex of mine has a big thing about them, and so I decided to ask him if he could explain the appeal. He said Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Diva,

Last week I attended the wedding of one of my best friends. While I was there, I hooked up with one of the bridesmaids. She was fun, and we had a really good time, but now she won’t answer my e-mails. I’d kind of like to date her, even though she lives three states away, but I’m beginning to think she was just using me for the sex.

Sincerely,
Jilted After the Altar

Dear Jilted,

I hate to break it to you, but there’s a good chance that you’re right. I know a lot of women who think that weddings are a great place to pick up men for casual sex. After all, people are drinking, their inhibitions are lowered, Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,

I have a great girlfriend. We’ve been together almost a year, and I’m completely in love with her. Everything is great between us except for one thing. She wants me to move in with her when my lease is up in 2 months. I think she may be the one for me, and I could see spending the rest of our lives together, but I just can’t imagine doing so in her apartment. It’s bigger than mine, which is why she thinks we should live there, but it’s all pink and girly and full of stuffed animals. What do you think we should do?

Sincerely,

I Remain Unmoved

Dear Unmoved,

I can understand your reluctance to move into your girlfriend’s apartment. It’s hard to move into a place that Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Diva,I really like it when my girlfriend bites me. She seems to like it too, at least she does it often enough. Is this dangerous? I never thought I’d have a vampire fetish, but biting is a hell of a lot of fun.

Sincerely,

Once Bitten

Dear Bitten,

Lots of people like a little, or a lot, of biting as part of their sexual play. While it’s a relatively Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,I have a problem. I only want to date people who don’t want to date me. I keep getting heartsick over my male friends, and then when I ask them out they tell me they’re not interested in me “in that way.” It sucks. I know I’m not hideously ugly or anything, because boys do hit on me; it’s just not any guys who I want to go out with. What’s wrong with me? Should I just go out with anyone who asks me? Or should I sit around pining over the guys I can’t have?

Sincerely,

I Want Them To Want Me

Dear Wanting,

We’ve all been there. I don’t know any straight woman with male friends who hasn’t fallen for one of them at some point or another. It can be a wonderful way to start a relationship, falling for a Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,
This may seem like a stupid thing to write to you about, but I hate my eyebrows. I have a unibrow, and they’re just sort of sitting like caterpillars on my face, and I have no idea what to do about them. People make snide comments, and I’ve kept them the way they are partially to show that I don’t care about what other people say, but also because I have no idea how to make them better. Do you have any advice? I’d talk to my girlfriends, but I’m afraid they’d laugh at me!

Sincerely

Hair Today, Hoping for Gone Tomorrow

Dear Gone Tomorrow,

Oh honey, did you ever pick the right Diva to write to. I have been having eyebrow issues since I was in my early teens, but it wasn’t until a friend of mine sat me down and said “I’m telling you this because I love you… we are doing something about your eyebrows,” that I Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars DivaI’m so excited! I’m a 26-year-old virgin and this weekend I finally get to have sex! I met this awesome 30-year-old woman on the Internet, and we’re getting together for the first time. What I want to know is this… do I really have to use a condom? It’s the first time I’m going to be having sex and I want to feel it. Plus, I read that it’s really unlikely I’d get AIDS from just having sex once so I don’t think I should have to. What do you think?

Sincerely,

Raring to Go

Dear Raring,

I think you should use a condom. You didn’t mention whether or not you’ve talked to this girl about Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,

I just met this really awesome girl. Not only is she insanely hot, she’s also smart and funny, and she’s totally into the same video games that I am. In short, she’s almost perfect. Why almost? Because on our second date, she told me she had tested positive for genital herpes. She said she’d never had any symptoms or anything, but now I’m kind of freaked out and not sure I want to date her anymore. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Sorely Confused

Dear Confused,

Although you have to do whatever makes you comfortable, let me give you some information Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,

I met this girl on an online personal site, and I’m really excited. We have so much in common! We both like the same books, we grew up in the same type of households, we even named our cats the same thing when we were kids! What’s the problem? She lives half way across the country. We haven’t met yet, but I’m totally falling in love with her. We’ve been talking for two months, and I want to ask her to move across the country to live with me. Do you think I’m making a mistake?

Sincerely,
Our Eyes Met Across A Crowded Internet

Dear Loverboy,

You haven’t met yet and you’re thinking about asking her to move in with you? Yes, I think you’re making a mistake. The thing that can make Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,

My girlfriend says I’m not really kinky because I hate the movie Secretary. I keep telling her that the fact that I like to be tied up and spanked should make my disdain for that utter mess of a movie irrelevant. She insists, however, that if I were truly kinky, deep down in my soul, I would appreciate its extraordinary artistic merit and wonderfully fair treatment of our lifestyle. Isn’t just liking bondage and pain enough?

Yours Sincerely,
Knot a Fan

Dear Knot,

Honey, I am with you. Your Diva is as kinky as they come and yet Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,

I have a problem. I’m in a long distance relationship and my girlfriend likes to pick fights with me over instant messenger. It drives me crazy. She’ll write something incendiary and then wander off to do the dishes or something while I’m left to stew over whatever she’s written. She takes everything I say the wrong way, and I’m afraid if this continues we’re going to end up breaking up over a misplaced comma. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Looking for a Life Sentence

Dear Sentence,

Fighting over IM is a terrible idea. Although the internet has been, in many ways, a boon for long distance relationships, what with web cams and the possibility of phone sex without a high phone bill, it has also given people who have a tendency towards the passive aggressive an easy excuse to fall into bad habits. What can you do about it? Refuse to fight over IM. Tell your girlfriend Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Darestars Diva,

There’s this sex blogger whose posts I read every day and I think she’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. I have no idea what she looks like, but her words are such an enormous turn on that I tend to picture her as a younger, sassier Catherine Zeta Jones. Recently I realized that she lives in the same city that I do! How can I meet her and be one of the amazing sexual adventures that she talks about in her blog?

Sincerely,
Looking for a Life Sentence

Dear Story Struck,

You’re so sweet! I hate to break it to you, but I don’t look like Catherine Zeta Jones at all, more like Jessica Rabbit. Just kidding! I know you’re not talking about me!. As for how to meet a sex blogger, Read the rest of this entry »